


Ahead of the Game

by lyricalive



Category: Touhou Project
Genre: F/F, First Meetings, Fluff and Humor, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:34:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24523177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyricalive/pseuds/lyricalive
Summary: [Kogasa POV]  "The times have changed.  Humans aren't as scared by scary things."The little umbrella receives some advice on how to be more successfully surprising... but she might be in a bit over her head.
Relationships: Hakurei Reimu/Kirisame Marisa, Sekibanki/Tatara Kogasa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	Ahead of the Game

"H-Hello, everyone. My name is Kogasa Tatara."

I could never figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I've tried being scary. I've tried being useful. But in the end, I'm just a useless _tsukumogami_ who can't do anything right at all. I desperately need some kind of role, some kind of direction!

And so, that day, I took a brave step… and decided to join the Grassroots Youkai Network.

There were already three members present when I showed up at the bank of Misty Lake.

"I'm glad you were able to make it out here." An elegant werewolf named Kagerou.

"It's so nice to have you! You'll be safe with us." A pretty mermaid named Wakasagihime.

"..." And a mysterious girl in red. She didn't introduce herself or say much during that first meeting…

I'd heard rumors about this group, where youkai who weren't as aggressive as the rest could band together for support. Maybe, with their guidance, I might find my new calling.

"Thank you! I've been having such a hard time doing my job lately, and I could really use any help I can get. I hope you'll take good care of me!"

The topics of the day included current events in the area of the bamboo forest and recent sightings of the Hakurei shrine maiden. It was all very interesting. I wondered if I could also manage to collect some useful information for them in return next time, by scouting from high in the clouds.

After the meeting's dismissal, I started on my way back to the temple where I usually stayed, where there were lots of good lookout points. The temple was another place I'd tried to fit in, but it just didn't feel right for me. I could barely stay awake during that monk's sermons, and I didn't get what she was talking about at all. At least, here in this little group, everyone was more like my peer. I had a good feeling about it.

" _Psst_. Umbrella girl."

All of a sudden, before I could take flight, a whisper beckoned me from somewhere along the side of the road. I spun around in all directions, looking for the source.

I almost missed her, because she blended in so well with the drooping autumn leaves. It was the mysterious third member of the network, leaning against the trunk of a tree with stiff crossed arms.

"The name's Sekibanki. I've been waiting for someone like you to come along."

"Someone like... me?"

She had gotten my name a little backwards, and she kept her closed eyes turned to the ground as she spoke. But I was pretty sure she was talking to me.

"Right. Those other two girls... You know what the difference is, between them and us?"

Oh? I'm a big fan of pop quizzes. I got to brainstorming, trying to answer her as fast as I could.

"Um... They have longer hair."

"What? No."

"They wear fancier clothes?"

"No. The difference is that those two would be perfectly content never to do a single youkai-like thing in their lives."

"Aw. I was close." I stuck my tongue out as a friendly joke.

"On the other hand, you and me... I can tell. We actually have the drive to do what youkai are supposed to do." She finally turned to face me, and her seriousness didn't waver one bit. She stared me down with her sharp red eyes, peering out over her tall collar. " _To embrace the monster within_."

"W-Well, yes. That's true." I had thought about giving up the dream many times, if only I could find something I was better suited to. But still, deep down… "I really, really want to be good at scaring people."

"Good. Then let me give you some advice, off the record." Her voice was low, almost monotone. "You have to get with the times. It's the only way to stay - heh - ahead of the game."

"I don't understand. What do you mean by that?"

"Humans are complicated yet delicate creatures. Their weaknesses continue to evolve with society."

She sure was using a lot of big words. I admired how smart and mature she seemed. 

"They say that humans, as the opposites of youkai, are more vulnerable of the body than of the spirit. Do you know what that is?"

"…What is it?"

"Heh-heh. One. Great. Big. **LIE!** "

The girl gave a dramatic sweep of her arm as the powerful word rang out through the trees, causing a few stray birds to squawk and scatter into the sunset. The wind billowed her long cape, completing the scene. And with its fabric no longer covering her upper body, her truth was revealed: a clean gap right between her head and shoulders.

A _rokurokubi_ … How amazing! The intimidating air she gave off was on another level. She looked so cool, all three of my eyes were glittering as they watched her. I decided I should definitely listen more carefully.

"Long ago, back when humans had no way of knowing that youkai existed, the fear was all in their heads to begin with. And that's when the fear was at its peak."

"Uh-huh..."

"Now, the humans around here know that youkai exist. If a monster pops up, it's hardly a matter of 'surprise.' It's just a fear of getting eaten."

"But... But surprising is my specialty."

"Well, you need to dig deeper. Your presence alone isn't surprising."

"It's not?"

"Not even on the lowest level. I doubt anyone would believe such a cute girl is going to eat them."

"I-I'm cute!?" Huh, huh? I could hardly keep up with the conversation!

"Though, you could make that work for you... Hm, yeah. Come to think of it, you have some potential, umbrella girl."

"Tell me! Tell me what I can do!"

This person in front of me... I was sure of it. She was going to change everything!

"Listen. Here's what I'm trying to say."

I leaned in extra close, so that no one else who might be lurking could possibly hear.

"They're not just scared to be hurt physically. They're scared to be hurt _emotionally_."

"You mean... In order to get fear, I need to go for an emotion besides fear itself?"

"Hey, you catch on quick. All you've got to do is find... what they're really scared of."

I understand now. The times have changed. Humans aren't as scared by scary things.

Caught up in their modern social lives, what they fear most are things like… commitment! rejection! public humiliation!

Miss Sekibanki told me that she has a lot of experience getting close to humans and figuring out what makes them tick. She blends in with them, pretending to be one of their kind, and they talk to her and share their secrets with her. Then, the biggest payoff would come when they finally get a glimpse of her true identity, the traumatic shock and surprise of realizing they'd been betrayed all along…!

Well, she'd never actually gotten that far, because revealing her identity would get her kicked out of the village. But the idea was a solid one. Rather than an amateur jump-scare, it was a good example of what it meant to prey on their deeper fears.

After this conversation, I thought very hard. And finally, I came up with the perfect plan of my own. Not only does it go after a new type of human emotion, but it plays perfectly to my personal strengths!

You see, there's a legendary ritual known by everyone as the _love-love umbrella_. The way it goes is, if two humans stand underneath the same umbrella, everybody around them will assume they're a lovey-dovey couple. This is where I come in. If someone gets caught under my umbrella by mistake, with all their friends watching… it would be _super_ embarrassing and _super_ surprising!

Brilliant, right?

Okay, so, first step. I needed to find a place with a whole lot of people gathered. As Miss Sekibanki had warned, pulling a stunt directly inside the human village was off limits. You'd get in trouble if you weren't really stealthy about it, and she didn't think I was ready.

Luckily, the information from the meeting had given me a lot of useful leads. I learned that, on the outskirts of the bamboo forest, that band of poltergeists was scheduled to be putting on a concert really soon. The stage was set up right at the end of the road from the human village, so a lot of humans would probably come! I did everything I could to prepare for this major chance.

Several days passed. The time had arrived. The first song had started to play.

I lurked around the crowd, my umbrella folded and facing the ground. 

The poltergeists sure had a whole lot of fans! That's right. Their band had only grown more and more popular ever since the new drummer joined. She was so talented. Talk about a _tsukumogami_ who had truly found her purpose…

I shook my head and made up my mind, determined. I want to live up to my own full potential.

And the cool, mysterious girl who gave me advice… I really want to impress her, too!

_"Gensokyo! Are you ready to rock?"_

There was a storm of noisy cheers as the song went into a lively drum solo. I hardly knew where I should start choosing a target out of the sea of faces… A few fairies buzzed around in a wild dance, totally out of tune. In the front row, a serious lady with long white hair quietly tapped her foot. Some teenagers from the village were cheerfully singing along. There might have even been some outsiders in the mix. Delicious, surprisable outsiders~

Then, off to the side, there was - A- _ha!_

Dressed in black and white with a gaudy hat, I remembered this one's name: Marisa Kirisame. She was a human who'd bullied me more than once before. The drizzly magician ought to be a perfect choice for an umbrella prank, wouldn't you say?

And standing next to her… What's this!? I thought I must have hit the jackpot. None other than the famous red-and-white shrine maiden!

If humans cared so much about their reputations, those two were the ones with the most to lose. Wouldn't it be absolutely scandalous if two rival youkai exterminators were caught in a love affair? The second I got them in my trap, they'd be scared silly just imagining the _tengu_ 's future headlines!

The band's opening number was almost over. I intended to time my attack just right for when everyone would be free to ogle the embarrassing sight.

Three… two… one… and…

A subtle entrance over the band's silence. While half of me kept hidden in the crowd, I had released my umbrella high into the sky, letting it descend slowly from above until it hung directly over my two victims.

The red-white noticed it first, and her mouth began to widen. First into a little o. Then into a bigger O. That's it!! It was so close I could taste it!

"…Oh. Erm. What is this?" The witch caught on, and grasped my handle as easily as if it belonged to her.

In an instant I spun myself around, my umbrella self, revealing the long pink tongue that wrapped all the way across the rim. And I made my presence known with a great big _BOO!_

"Hahaha!" Jumping up from the pack of people, I pointed at her triumphantly with my index finger. "Now everybody thinks you're in loooove! Are you surprised?"

"Oh, it's you," she answered without a hint of distress. "Not really."

"Bwuh?"

"The sun was kinda gettin' in our eyes anyway. Ain't this more comfy for you too, Reimu?"

"But wait! This is a _love-love umbrella_. It's got you both under it. Aren't you embarrassed?"

They traded glances, and then looked at me blankly.

"N-no way." I didn't know what to do with myself. "Is she... actually your girlfriend?"

"Hm. It has a real nice ring to it." The witch squeezed out a satisfied wink. "Whaddya say, Reimu? Wanna be my girlfriend?"

The shrine maiden crossed her arms. "Geez… I thought I already was. There's no need to make a big deal about it."

"All right! It's official, _ze_!" She carelessly dropped my umbrella in order to grasp the shrine maiden's hand, and raised both of their hands together to wave at the stage. "Oi, Prismrivers! Play a nice slow one next for me and the girlfriend!"

"Marisa! What did I just say about making a big deal?" With one eyebrow raised, her face was the tiniest bit blushy, but her smile was as carefree as could be.

The audience around them laughed - with them, not at them - and clapped, like it was all just an extra part of the show. As the strings started on the next performance, I slinked away with my umbrella, no longer noticed.

"Wait a minute, you." Yikes! I was noticed. And I knew that look. The shrine maiden was cutting her eyes at me like I was in trouble.

"No worries, Reimu. She was only tryin' to spread some love." Was her partner going to spare me? "You've gotta fight love with love, I always say."

Before I realized what was happening, the rainbow-colored beam of a LOVE SIGN: MASTER SPARK-LIKE FLASHLIGHT was shooting out straight toward me. With a leap and a yelp, I just barely grazed it, but the energy still sent me flying into a nearby bamboo patch.

I laid there a while, listening to the muffled music of the concert. At some point, I raised my head out of the brush to look back at the scene that had left me behind. And - _get this!_ \- that red-white was resting her head all cozy on the black-white's shoulder! Meanwhile, the witchy one was waving her laser straight up in the air like it was the world's biggest glowstick.

It's totally not fair! Of all people, they had to be the two most fearless humans ever!

I mean... They do make a pretty adorable couple. I guess I'm happy for them?

No, what am I saying? The point is, I'm such a failure!

And now I'm actually jealous of their romance, too! Boooo…

Back on the bank of the lake, I sat on a large rock as I waited for the next week's network meeting. A light rain was pouring, and I hunched my body up under my umbrella half, wallowing in shame. How was I going to face that girl today? Not only had I let her down, but I'd wasted all my time and forgotten to gather any info to share.

"Hey, umbrella girl."

"M-Miss Sekibanki!" The person on my mind appeared before my eyes.

"How'd it work out for you?"

I sniffled, and then lowered my umbrella further to hide my pathetic crying face. The only thing I could do after all was tell her the truth. "…It didn't! They weren't surprised at all."

"Tsk. Even though you followed my advice?"

She took a seat beside me and sighed, resting her head on her hand. Like, her entire head.

"I went to a crowded place. I chose the humans who would make for the biggest scandal. I planned everything out so perfectly!"

She shook her head (in her hand) in disappointment.

"Tough break, umbrella girl. Things like this happen in our common-senseless world."

"I'm sorry… You had such high hopes for me. No one's ever had high hopes for me before. I really wanted to make you proud."

"…"

Miss Sekibanki suddenly jerked her body straight, sliding the head swiftly back into place. And she used it to look me dead in the eyes.

"Huh?"

"Kogasa." She said my name! "You can't give up, got it? You're a member of the network now. Not just yours, but all youkai's honor is on the line."

I felt so relieved by her support, my tears were coming back full force.

"Th-Thank you… Thank you so much. I promise, I won't give up!"

Without thinking, I buried my face in the folds of her cape collar and sobbed.

"Uh... Hm."

She stretched her newly connected neck to accommodate me better, and patted me lightly on the back.

Such a kind soul. And so warm...

"Seki, is that - _Oh._ "

I was snapped back to my senses by the familiar voice of another youkai approaching us.

It was the werewolf, who bared her fangs in a toothy smile. "Are we interrupting something?"

On cue, the mermaid from last week also made a splash as she peeked out of the lake behind us, swishing her tail happily.

"Oh, Seki. You've gotten this friendly with the new recruit already? How sweet!"

And it was only then that I noticed just how closely Miss Sekibanki and myself were huddled under the dripping roof of my umbrella.

Under my umbrella.

This must look like…

"...AAAAH!"

I sprang up on one foot, clutching my handle tightly. My cheeks were burning hot, almost turning the falling rain into steam around me.

It can't be! It's totally not fair! My own surprise doesn't count!


End file.
